Friday, October 1, 2010

Thank You For Being There

I couldn't sleep last night. My mom was snoring and the dogs were making a lot of noises. I started playing with my mom's hand. I tried all the possible ways to hold someone's hand.It was funny how i had to adjust my body up down left and right so that our hands were both in a comfortable position. Then i wondered if love is the same, to love someone you have to adjust yourself in a way to be able to always give them the best. As i was thinking, i fell asleep. 


Then I fell into a really awful nightmare. I dreamt that Louise got into some trouble and my mom had to go into jail for her. My dad talked about spliting our property. I pleaded Jason to help me convince my dad that we'll behave and all but he just wouldn't take his eyes off the laptop screen. He kept telling me to give him a minute. Louise said she has no time cos she wants to go clubbing and then she throws the bomb on me that she's moving out. I begged the police officers lawyers and judges to help me but none of them listened. They turned their backs on me and occupied themselves with some other things. They sentenced my mom to 70 years of prison. I cried and pleaded, yelled and demanded but nothing seemed to work. I ended up holding everyone's legs and begged to stay, to help. I kept crying cos it felt like it was the end of the world. Then i heard my mom telling me that everything's okay and that it's all just a dream. She hugged me and said it's just a nightmare, and that everything's all right. I was so happy to hear her and feel her wrapping her arms around me. I felt like i was safe and nothing could hurt me at the time. I think the best thing a person can get is to have someone there to hold you and comfort you when you're jolted awake from a nightmare.


I woke up later in the morning and told my mom the whole story. Then we went for breakfast. In the car, we were talking about something about our neighbours and only i got to know that one of the elderly uncle passed away. I still remember how he mistaken me as a malay girl. I was walking home and when he saw me he asked where was i going and when i said home, he was surprised to hear cos he thought there wasn't any malay families in the neighbourhood. He kept speaking in his quite broken Malay even though i spoke Mandarin. No matter how hard i tell him i live here and that i'm not a Malay, he wouldn't listen. It was like he doesn't care for it. He takes his evening walks everyday at 6.30. We would always have the same conversation everytime. I'd ask him if he's had his dinner and he'd tell me that he has dinner at 6 and takes his walk at 6.30. Then he'll go on about his leg and how walking everyday helps. I used to see him all the time. It feels weird now that i don't get to see him anymore. May he rest in peace in a better place.


Inez.

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